i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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