do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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