thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
