That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Randomize
