@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
