he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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