he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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