This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
