You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Randomize
