I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
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"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
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Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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