can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?