How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Acid is not a monday night drug
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
