piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
