I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
