oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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