I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
A+ Viking dick
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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