Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
