windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
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