Whoa Z and x make the same sound
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
