capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
