Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
We have started to decorate penises.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
