I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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