hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
