How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize
