we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize