There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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