Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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