don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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