I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
