I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
that may or may not have been my penis.
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