You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
