dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
