mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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