Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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