finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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