Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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