That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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