i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
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And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
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I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
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