what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
