No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
