normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
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