Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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