what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
