There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize