The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
