I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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