Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
