Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
