Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
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She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
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She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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