Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
