did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
