stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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